Another Beautiful Day In Chaos

sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't…

Head Doctor

Head Doctor: A woman who has retained a P.H.D. in oral sex.

and it’s something I feel very passionate about. I have many girlfriends who do not reciprocate orally.

Which is really shitty, if you ask me. If you expect your man to please you orally… (and who doesn’t, seriously?) then you sure as hell better be down for doing the same.

If you’re not? He should hold out on you.

and if you do a lame, half-assed job? He should do the same.

I had one boyfriend in the past that didn’t like to reciprocate… and I can count on one finger how many times he inspired me enough to want to blow him. Once.

Because the key to good head- is LOVING it. Not just tolerating it- and not just going through the motions because it’s his birthday or your anniversary.

Step up to the plate girlfriend and hit one out of the park. He’ll look at you a little differently… and he’ll mean it when he says he loves you. Cause it’ll be the only thing he can think about until you do it again.

Look up at him- his eyes will roll into the back of his head anyway- and hell- who are you trying to impress right now? Your mom? Or your man? Embrace that tramp-fabulous girl you know you have locked away. She’s fun… and he loves her. In fact?

He can’t get enough of her… and if you’ve done your job- you’re in for the time of your life.

Because the key to any man… is not through his stomach… though it does help- and it does give you quite an advantage… the key to any man- is in the back of your throat.

Sorry to be indelicate… but it’s true.

Ask any man. If he’s going to be completely honest with you… He’ll tell you.

I can hear the emails already…whining that you hate it… really? Why? Cause it tastes bad? Buy flavored lube… suck on a lifesaver (or better yet, an Altoid- but be sure to warn him), pull him into the shower… or just look at him- this is the man you want- the man you love- and the man you want to please…. and because it’s your turn next…

Inspire him. It’s in your best interest. How many short term investments can you make that have HUGE quick returns? None that pay out like this one.

Have a drink(s)- turn on your favorite music…feel sexy- however you get to that feeling. Kiss him- want him- and blow his damn doors off.

Being empowered is a fabulous rush- and honeychild… when you do this well- you own him. 🙂

Own. Your. Shit.

Because… finding yourself in love with someone is a great feeling… but don’t be lazy just because you’ve “landed” him. Don’t sit down on the job! For crying out loud, do not give him a reason to stray. If you love him- show him…

Like he realllllllllly wants you to….

…again, you’re welcome, cute boys of the world.

Categories: Love

Tags: ,

9 replies

  1. omg THANK YOU for saying this. i am a good catholic girl – not yet married but soon (fingers crossed). well, maybe i’m not that good because i love giving head. my boyfriend loves it too, and loves that i love it. all my girlfriends talk about it like it’s horrible and awful and i am a freak for enjoying it…but i can’t help it–and i’m amazing at it!

  2. Spit or swallow?

  3. And they thought the Sermon on the Mount was a hallmark of God’s word here on earth. This blog post should be smote into stone and made required reading by all.

    E P I C Truth.

  4. Oh baby! I’m with you, I love going down and taste my man! he taste like candy to me and i love it! and you right, many of my friends don’t “like it” or don’t want to like it, but I think you right, is about own your shit baby!
    Love you my sweet friend, very very spicy!!

  5. Terrific work! This should be shared around the world. Shame on the search engines for not positioning this post higher!

  6. Keep up the good work, I love your writing.

  7. Jenni…. It’s nearly time for you to come visit my island…i’m sooo returning the crush on you…




  1. Viral – Another beautiful day in chaos

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