Red as a radish.

An enemy found my blog and posted the link on Facebook.

Ouch.

Which led to my mom reading about me giving a mean blow job…

Double Ouch.

Seeing a comment come in from my cousin… who is someone I love & admire and would rather not know about my scandalous sexuality?

The paragon of virtue cousin reading it???? Complete with a few F bombs in the first sentence?

Oh My God In Heaven.

I think I had my first hot flash. I started mentally filing through blog entries, gasping for air and turning a deeper shade of red with each realization. Ohhh no…  Head Doctor. Wet. Objectified. Vivid….

Yeah… it’s true. I say fuck a lot. Among other things I do that I probably shouldn’t. Or should at least know better to avoid. Or not admit to?

But I don’t, and I won’t, because it’s what makes me, Me. It’s what makes it real and it’s what makes my life more than work, laundry & paying bills.

So I’m a little naughty… or a lot…. and I swear like a sailor.

Dying of mortification, an email comes in and I’m opening it with one eye open… bracing for his shock…

I got a big bowl of I love you instead. I told you he was cool….

My blog making a top ten list was an unbelievable compliment, but it doesn’t come close to this… and he gave me permission to share it. ♥

Jenni,

I figured I’d respond this way rather than continuing to post on the blog.

It’s very true that there are indeed some things that cousins just shouldn’t know about one another. I actually stumbled upon your blog quite literally by accident. You’d mentioned your blog being listed on a Top 10 list on your Facebook page recently.

Seeing that I wasn’t aware you were writing a blog, as well as following other blogs that are written by friends and family in an effort to keep up with how things are going with them, I figured I’d wander over and check it out.

WOW!!!  *speechless*  WOW!!!  =)

Now before you panic again at the thought of me reading some of your blog, please realize that I truly and honestly got a good laugh out of the posts that I read. You’re a fantastic writer and an easy, pleasant read to boot.  The subject matter, while extremely salacious at times, is enjoyable in a ‘having sex with your wife in your office at work’ sorta way. Don’t ask, just realize it’s a lot of fun with a heavy blush to the face and a nervous sweat to go along with it…or so I’ve heard. 😉 Besides, I’m far less of a prude than most folks take me for.

In any event, I didn’t check out the blog too much, so don’t worry that all of your personal moments are now a part of the continuum of perspective that makes up my view of you in life. Besides, there’s not a thing in the world that could change the fact that I love and care about you and your sweet kids dearly. Blood is blood and nothing can change that fact. We share a common bond of love, family, and heritage that, in my opinion and view, transcends anything that life can throw at either of us.

Men (and women) are that they might have joy.

Anyhow, I hope you’re not bothered by the fact that I happened upon your blog. I’ll definitely not pass its existence along in favor of allowing others to simply find it if fortune smiles upon them as well. =)

Love ya tons Cuz!!

Wow… and even more…

If you want to blog about my e-mail, I’m cool with that. Your blog represents your life in its most intimate form–the ups and downs, highs and lows, smiles and tears, friends, family, and ultimately even those not worth the effort you might muster up to show your disgust. So, yeah, blog away. This is all part of it.
Overall though, don’t be mortified I might be reading. It’s not any different than keeping a journal other than you’ve chosen to share yours as you write it. =) We’ve all written things in our journals we’d mortified to have certain people read. Most of us suppose those journals won’t be read until we die and their contents are revealed, so I understand your natural hesitancy in that regard.

I’m a little stunned. Actually…a lot stunned. I’m still red as a radish… but I’m also so flattered I have to say.

Thank you.

Because it makes me want to value myself a little more. Stick up for myself a little more. Expect a little better and a little more, so that when my wonderful cousin reads my blog? He can be proud of me.

Because the fact that he is… means I must be doing something right.

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