Dear Nathan…

Dear Nathan, aka Perfectpants, aka Liarpants, aka Cheaterpants, aka Mr. On The Chopping Block,

You have so many personalities, I figured it was only fair you had a few nicknames to choose from.

And HEY!!! You love attention… and you always wanted to be famous…. 1001 hits on my blog yesterday and climbing…

You’re welcome. 🙂

Though I think maybe I made you more infamous than famous… details schmetails. Enjoy.

I can’t decide if you’re a worm? Or a snake… but I’m just pissed off enough to explore my other options too. I think perhaps you’re a weasel.

Weasels break into the chicken yard in the middle of the night and kill the chickens. They don’t eat them… they’re in it purely for the pleasure of torturing the sweet innocent bird to death. They don’t just kill one. They kill EVERY chicken in the hen house.

You fucked with the wrong bird.

You played me, I get it- you totally and completely wormed your way into my life. Deliberately, saying everything I wanted to hear, and fast. Dancing with me, flowers for me and for my daughter… you have hella game, I’ll give you that.

To a point….

My daughter never liked you.

I- Why is he always walking around saying “High Five, Good Game! It’s lame… and nobody cares about your stupid military stories enough to listen to them CONSTANTLY. Mom, don’t go out with him again. I like the dog though?

She made me the funniest thing after we found out what a liar and a cheat you are.

It’s an eggshell- and it says:

“I hope he dies in a fire and gets reincarnated into a mosquito and you kill him. High 5 good game. Men, who needs men?”

You can’t fool a redhead, and she thought you were a douche from day one.

I- Why is he always going out to his car? Who is he talking to? Something’s not right.

I should have listened to babygirl.

Because you were going to your truck to drink scotch out of your water bottle.

Or call your other girlfriend? I looked at your call history too asshole, you are absolutely the most disgusting human being I’ve ever had the pleasure of throwing under the bus.

All you had to say for yourself yesterday?

N- Excuse me wow! Ok! Well welcome to the small town express!!!

Wow? I’ll give you wow… wow is spending every weekend with me, then falling off the face of the earth to do the same thing with her. In front of people you KNOW I’m going to meet or have met at some point. With the baby even? And Remington? I have never been so offended.

Granted- I’m the idiot that listened to your line of bullshit- and I’m the fool that bought it….

You sweet talked your way right into my heart… and my bed. A friend warned me.

S- That guy is a snake. Snakes are poisonous- do not date him. You’re way too nice for that liar.

Ohhh but I knew better. You were different. I defended you. Begged people to give you a second chance because after all, that was years ago…

You could be trusted because you loved me SO much.You were perfect. Singing to me… dancing with me… playing in the garden & spoiling my daughter with fireworks.

Cooking me the perfect steak. Sigh…

<eyeroll> gag.

You were a satisfying source of unpredictable sex, Sunday & Monday. Plain and simple.

I tolerated your endless boring bullshit military war stories because you have a big dick… and as long as I climbed on top of you before you were too drunk? It was great…

Which is why I high five, good-gamed you, ala Tucker Max. Not knowing you were going to adopt it as your tag line.

Left to your own? You’re no picnic in the sheets. There’s a deadness in your eyes that always haunted me and perhaps it’s because you’re so busy fucking so many different people? I don’t know- it’s fucked up… and if weren’t for my rolling you onto your back and taking control of the situation? It wouldn’t have been that great. I can admit that now.

You’re not supposed to beat a woman to the finish line. Bad form Nathan, really bad form.

But where I really go ape shit in this situation? Is when I talk to Ms. Babymama and she assures me he was never in the military, she’s talked to his mom.

Lying about being a soldier? Wearing dog tags you bought online? Impersonating an Army Ranger?

My heart stops in my chest a little. Some of my best friends are military boys. I have a Marine fetish. Something about the white gloves, shiver… at any rate… I still have your Army tshirt. It’s so horrible a thought I couldn’t wrap my mind around it.

Who does that? WTF? Two fresh military tattoos…. a ranger tattoo and a special forces tattoo…???

I’ve heard of being a fan of military memorabilia… but impersonating a soldier is just scary pathologically disturbing.

My daughter said it best…

I- He wore an Army t-shirt on the 4th of July… who has the nerve to do that? Where’s a Veteran when you need one, I’d like to give them his picture and let him explain himself to someone who will kill him for being a liar.

With a new text message from him chiming in a minute ago…

N- What the fuck? Who said that I was fucking her?


J- You have to be joking. You expect me to buy that?

N- Ha ha I think its kinda funny she is like my little sister. She just drove me up to Sandpoint but believe the Bitch. Another one jumps on the crazy wagon.

N- We will talk later.

You use the same lines over and over again- I know because posting your name has brought in a windfall of “OMG me TOO!” emails. Awesome.

Perhaps it’s time someone created a Nathan is a Dirty Lying Cheat page on Facebook?

The bitch? I had emails rolling in all day yesterday from the many women of the I-hate-Nathan gang. There are many of them. They all cried about it to me.

You have that effect on people.

What I find most pathetic? Is the blatant fraud that you are. Creating these feelings and situations with multiple people at the same time. Morphing into whatever you know will disarm us the fastest… playing on our weaknesses.

Yep. It’s official… I figured it out.

You’re a snake.

A slimy dishonest worthless threat to everyone around you.

The best part of hate blogging you?

Is that now when you use your “Google my name” line on your next unsuspecting victim?

They’ll be able to read up on what a liar you are.

Which makes your hate blog a veritable public service announcement.

Proving once and for all that snakes are dangerous…. but fuck with a chicken and you’re liable to get pecked to death…

One word at a time.

12 thoughts on “Dear Nathan…

  1. OMFG….he wasnt really a marine….after all the stories and lost soldier lies? OMFG now Im pissed. I lost a very dear friend in this war, he was a Marine, a real, true blue fucking marine. He died serving this country and he earned his god dam fucking dog tags, if I ever see this nathan, I swear to go Im a break his fucking nose!!!!!

  2. I dated someone like this once, and I was struck by the same sense of disgusting awe that he could simultaneously play with multiple women, apparently for the mere pleasure of doing so. Not because he was honestly interested in them all and “torn” about whom to choose. No, simply because he could and apparently enjoyed the challenge. I was smarter and older than some of the others, so I recovered, but the trail of his destruction — sad, young women who were destroyed by him — stretched across continents. Literally.

    I just don’t get it.

    Oh, and don’t get me started on impersonating a military man. My dad, retired Air Force, lives in Seattle and would gladly take care of your problem if he heard that. 😉

    • Was his name Nathan? Sounds like we dated the same guy.

      I liked him so much- and he went above and beyond to be the perfect guy- until he didn’t… and wasn’t… and isn’t.

  3. trust me

    LOL, he is a joke. He’s never spent a day in the military. They wouldn’t have him even if he had the balls to join. Know why?! Because he’s got a criminal record. Oh yeah… look it up.

    And last I heard, one year in military school doesn’t qualify you as “special forces”. (eye roll)

    So sad. So many lies to so many people. So much pain brought upon women who posess lovely hearts of gold, women who just want to be loved, adored, cared for.

    Game over, NS. I’m sure hell is waiting for you with open arms.

    • That’s just so horrible I couldn’t believe it. It’s just so extremely horrible it makes me nauseous.

      Game over, for sure…

      He’s at least learned to not cheat on a blogger again, right?


  4. dixie

    haha, get him! I’ve been deceived before and thought the man I moved hundreds of miles away for and believed every word was who I was getting. WRONG! Nothing can break a woman down quite like that. It took a very long time of running every action, conversation, and situation through my head a few times before I accepted he’s just a liar and told me only what he knew I wanted to hear. More power to you girl for calling him out on here. I’m still trying to convince people who tell me what a great guy I had, really. It’s sad.

  5. I admit it…. I’m a GUY and I facebooked him. Was disappointed when I found his profile to be private. I met guys like this in HIGHSCHOOL. Pathological liars – weird ones – but lying about being a supergothemovampire is one thing… lying about all this…. bullshit is over the top. I can smell it from here.

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  7. john doe

    Pathalogical liar, bipolar… without a doubt. I am not a doctor but I have observed this man from the shadows for a few years now and he is literally insane.

    He has multiple children that he does not take care of or provide for whatsoever. He makes threats if you call him out on his BS.

    Believe me if he sees all this. You will have threats of all kinds… from the “best attorneys that he has” (That his parents definitely would never not pay for)…. to him threatening to do something violent to you himself if he sees that he’s caught and can’t lie his way out.

    He has been to jail more than once for spousal abuse and drug use, has had restraining orders and probation … but has always had rich parents to bail him out of his problems. If they have finally cut off the 30 year old by now..

    And the military… please. For the sake of the anonymity of my source there is so so much more than could be shown about this that would probably be enough that someone somewhere might want to have him committed.

    It is not a question that he is a plague to society, his actions are not acceptable in society and I think that even if there is no such law that makes destroying other peoples lives illegal, something legal should be done about him. It needs to stop. So many lives, so many young women completely drained and left scarred for the rest of their lives. Mental abuse that is far worse than anything physical. And children who are being raised by single mothers not receiving any support or I would guess even a call on a birthday or Christmas…

    This is the kind of stuff people make movies about. You can’t make this stuff up.

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