Truth, and all it’s trappings.

I’ve been hit by the truth train. I’ve had to face my own ignorance and ignore the fact that the signs were all there… I just didn’t want to see them. February 2nd through the 6th… four days of bullshit that felt so real… for a minute.

I wanted my Pirate. My T… the man I’d waited my whole life for.

Unfortunately, he’s already someone else’s Pirate. Someone else’s T. I wish I could say it doesn’t hurt, but it hurts badly.

How stupid could I be?

This stupid.


Of all the lying, cheating husbands… this one had to go and charm me.

Just in case there’s any debate? Here’s video too.

34 thoughts on “Truth, and all it’s trappings.”

  1. You are not stupid. He is a con artist who takes advantage of beautiful, open hearted, trusted women, He is the reason women become jaded. Judging by how he treated you, and the fact that he is married, this man hateds women. Think of how he treated you those 4 days…would you want to be married to THAT? His poor wife.

    Mr.T was probably the victime of abuse as a child and is taking it out on women now. Pity the fool…the fool being him.

      1. wow, not surprising at all. I am sorry for all those who had to go through his anger. I was engaged to a man who was similar. Not fun.

  2. I’m sure it doesn’t surprise you but, I am one more female who was duped by his beautiful words. Email me if you want to know more…

    1. I recently met TJ. Something didn’t seem quite right, I ALWAYS have my guard up. Anyway,my sister was visiting and joined me for a group dinner that TJ attended. She shared my skepticism and found Jenni’s blog re Puerto
      Rico. Thank you to all of you who have blogged, I hope that many women have been warned and spared. I am interested in hearing your stories to see how similar it may be to what I have seen.

    1. Happiness has a way of doing that. I loved him so much, and it was incredible for a minute.

      Magical bullshit. Whoa.

      You guys are too nice. Apparently I’m supposed to be thankful for him not telling everyone how fat I am. What a prince.

    2. You guys have really saved my spirit in such a horribly dark time. I appreciate your kindness, your compliments and most of all? Your truth. I had emails start rolling in the day I got back, when I was so desperately sad missing him and feeling like I was the cause of the end of my love story. Even in the face of the details, I still just loved him. I had no way to go and nothing to turn to- and you all swooped in and saved me with good old fashioned kinship. I am forever in your debt.

  3. You know… and to add. I always thought it was weird he went and traveled all over the US for the holidays, yet couldn’t take a few days to visit you. I thought that was quite odd… especially someone where money seemed to be no object, why not take a couple days to visit the love of your life? Oh yea.. that’s right, because he was with his WIFE probably visiting family. Wow. I guess I’m gullible too because I never saw ALL this coming. He was fishy… but I didn’t know he was that much of a liar.
    Wow… sad life he lives. That’s just amazing.

    1. I even offered to meet him, and I thought it was weird too. Especially because I was going to travel so far the next month. We’d planned on January, but it ended up being the first weekend in February.

      He called me from his trip, from the airport on his way home, and late at night several times. He gave me no reason to suspect how bad it really is.

      Positively VILE.

      1. this was his big trip that all his buddies planned all these special nights for him with bull riding (or was it horseback riding?) that he was always the best at, and all his friends gathered round him from far and wide to adore at his feet….wait, I’m getting all these stories mixed up now, I thought i was reading the Bible because he was everyone’s Savior, ok now I am even more confused, must go rinse my eyeballs out in bleach because I am dirty and not worthy of reading his stories

      2. The key to this is HE called YOU. Did you ever have permission to call HIM? I’m still dumbfounded by the whole scenario. I just really don’t get how someone can live a lie like that. I guess people do it everyday…it’s sad. Sad for his wife. Sad for you. Sad for him, even.
        The worst part is… I don’t think this is the end for him. I think he’s addicted to the person he pretends to be.. and the attention he gets from vulnerable women. I’m sure he’s going to start another blog… and do the same thing to someone else.

      3. I’m just wondering why he allowed you to take pictures, and even a video? Did he not think you would post pictures of your wonderful vacation?? Unless he planned on deleting the pics before you left some how, before it all blew up.

        I’m worried that may become vindictive, in only the ways a sociopath can….Jenni, you do have a police report on him right? Has you threatened you physically? If so, I would def show the emails/texts to the police. Somebody has to stop him before he hurts someone….maybe everybody who ever got an email from “Mr. T” should send a copy to the police….

  4. Damn Jenni you are beautiful! He looks like he is old enough to be your papa. I am sad for his kids and his wife. I am sad for the little boy he was and the terrible upbringing that makes him think this is ok. By continued text to Jenni, he is just making a bigger clown of himself. A sad sad old man wishing he was all those things when he is just the shadow of pathetic. A pathetic soul who writes diatribes and other lies like book deals and fake adventures. Charming he is not.

    1. I bought it… hook, line & sinker.

      I feel absolutely horrible for her and I hate for her to read all of this, but he is a virus that NO woman should have to bear.

      That he had the nerve to send me hateful bullshit again this morning is only testament to his complete lack of a soul. All this time, he’s been sleeping next to his wife. I spent the early morning being sick… reading her blog and seeing that she was planting things the day we were kissing in the rainforest and hiking to waterfalls. All that magic that I was drowning in, along with my own heartache and tears missing him so much I could hardly breathe.

      What a lousy, lying fucker.

    2. You’re too nice, and thank you. It was the first time I noticed people blanch at the sight of me sitting with him. I just loved him. I’m sad for anyone who could do this to someone else. “First do no harm” should not only apply to doctors and nurses. I haven’t heard from him since this morning when I told him if he didn’t stop harassing me I would start making phone calls. Weird.

  5. Wow! I hate to say that I “like” this post because I’m sure you are hurt by what this guy did to you. What I do like is honesty, the cold truth you freely give. I wish you all the best. Peace and Love.

    1. In the end, all you have is the truth. I’m a little broken… or a lot, depending on your definition. Either way I’m going to be just fine.

      Determined to steer clear of the Douche aisle at the store….

  6. Jenni,

    I came to your site because I saw Precarious Gait’s post about Thomas and I wanted to give you words of encouragement and have just spent more than an hour reading about the details of your trip.

    Thomas is a classic psychopath/narcissist (all psychopath’s are narcissist’s but not all narcissists are psychopaths). I have been out of a off/on relationship with a man very much like Thomas and I wanted to say; try not to beat yourself up about ignoring red flags and falling for his lies. Other people always think they would have seen the signs or maybe they did and ran; that doesn’t mean you are to blame for your own abuse. These men throw the net out there,they used the same lines on every woman and wait to see who takes the bait. They are master manipulators, predators, soul vampires, they do not have a conscience, they don’t have empathy, it is not a choice for them; they do not possess either and never will. They create a fantasy life, or two or three, their need for adoration is like a drug to them. They NEED to be idolized, so they must constantly have a line up of women to keep feeding their addiction.

    They get you hooked, the best sex ever, (you can bet his wife only gets sex like that when she has had enough of his bullshit and she’s ready to leave). Declarations of undying love, mine said he’d thought he’d been in love before but that was before he met me. And then out of the blue reject you; you’re confused, what did you do to make him angry, you just want him loving you again. His love is like nothing you’ve ever known and then he forgives you for making him lose control.

    The playing the women on his blog is so typical; women will claw each others eyes out to get the man; he sets it up that way. Then when he picks a woman she feels so “special”; he picked her and could have had anyone of those other women. In truth he’s placing half a doz.

    My ex had hundred’s of women on his FB and ads in 1/2 a doz dating sites. I got into his POF acct and he was sending almost exactly the same message to 6 dif women. I warned them all and he just told them I was his psycho ex that had hacked his computer. But with me he was crying professing his love and begging for another chance to prove I was all the woman he’d ever want or need.

    He even lied about having 6 months to live in order to get me back.

    I am not stupid, nor am I unattractive, desperate or needy; a hopeless romantic maybe, a sucker for poetry, being swept off my feet and being the love of someone’s life.

    Don’t spend a minute feeling sorry for him, he doesn’t care about anything except his need for adoration and protecting his fantasy life. There is no helping them because they don’t think they have a problem beside they can’t give a person a conscience transplant and he can’t grow one. The only emotions he feels are anger and fear of being found out.

    If he know where you live be very careful, my ex was very conniving in his revenge and it is by the grace of God I am here to talk about it. But talk about it I am because I want to warn other women about these predators¤ knowledge IS power! Good on ya for not keeping your mouth shut and exposing him. By informing people and making other women aware of their tactics and the trail of devastation they leave behind them maybe we can save someone from being abused by one of these assholes.

    Take care, I am soi glad you are here to tell your story and that you have the support of family and friends to help you exorcise this soul vampire from your heart.

  7. Oh God. Wow. So I Googled my ex fiancee, Thomas Murray, to see what ever came of him. We were engaged 15 years ago. He screwed me over, then, much like you, only there was no wife…just 2 other girlfriends. I won’t go into the gory details, but the last I knew of him he was headed to Puerto Rico. I googled “Thomas Murray Puerto Rico” and this came up. Then I saw the pictures. I feel sick. SO fucking ill. I’m sorry this happened to you. (and me.)

  8. He’s at it again I do believe. I’m so fortunate you told your story here and I stumbled upon it before anything went any further. Please email me if you’d like to chat as I would prefer to not discuss details publicly.

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