On a day that started too early, too sadly and in full on pity party mode… I took a shower, took my naughty mongrels on a walk and filled a mason jar with ice water and indulged my favorite habit…
A pair of bikini bottoms, a towel and my quart jar of water…. combined with 100* of heaven in the greenhouse- and my smile reappeared.
I have one thing that I don’t ever give away… my faith. I know that good things will happen. I know that I am surrounded by amazing friends who truly love me and a family so close we begin and end our conversations with “I love you”.
I have it all- including the freedom to choose what I want to do with my life, with my body and with my future.
I had so many lovely kind messages from friends near and far- little love notes via email or text- all day. I love all of you- and if I don’t express it often enough or so that you feel it, let me take a little moment to just say…
I love you, I appreciate you, and I must be doing something right to hear those two phrases from so many fantastic people when I need to hear them most.
I caught a few rays of sunshine. I fell in love with my baby tomato plants which have all sprouted in the last few days and are a lovely verdant variety of potential deliciousness. I stopped for an hour and coated my feet in cocoa butter. I painted my nails. I did my very best to find the goodness in a day that could have crushed me.
Warm and snuggly, smelling like chocolate and coconut suntan lotion- nothing can feel too horribly overwhelming. I sat down to work on my resume and realized it is missing in action…. and instead of putting off the inevitable, I took a shower, blew my platinum self dry and put my face on. Dressed, painted and nervous- I drove out to fill out an application at my job of choice… shaking in my shoes a little and doing my best to fake the confidence my friends think I have…. and I filled out the application and realized I know a helluva lot. I’m a farming, graphic designing super-server… I’ve got this. If not at my first choice? Somewhere else.
The woman at the restaurant was wonderful and kind. It was like a Bandaid on my nerves- and I left with a permanent smile, knowing at the very least that everything will work out just as it’s meant to, and relishing the thought of being appreciated at work. What a novel idea?
It was raining lightly as I crossed the bridge into the beautiful small town I live in, and the first thing I saw crossing our beautiful lake Pend Oreille? A rainbow.
Then another one.
I had just enough time to stop and get ice cream for my little princess, only to get a call letting me know that they’d closed work for the night due to some flooring issues and I would NOT have to work my least favorite shift on my poor damaged toe.
Did I say this was a bad day? This day is turning out to be downright fucking amazing. An impromptu night off with little red, ice cream in the cup-holder and hours ahead to lazily make dinner and take a bike ride if the weather cooperates.
Caprese salad and beef satay for dinner, because moms that get the night off ACTUALLY get to cook for fun. Coffee Haagen Daaz, the new Footloose movie and nothing but hope coursing through my veins on a day that started so dimly.
God bless Redbox, God bless a surprise night off…
and God bless the people in my life that remind me not to give up and feel hopeless.
Little Red smiled at me and giggled.
R- We should buy some scratch tickets, crank the music and dance. We should eat dinner in the greenhouse, take a bike ride and paint our nails.
And that’s exactly what we did.
Icing on the cake of a day that started out badly and ended with the two of us in PJ’s, planting basil, nasturtiums and bells of Ireland…
Singing at the top of our lungs and dancing our hearts out… ♥