I’m disappointed in people these days. My job is taking a toll on me and I hate to sound like an old lady… but people rarely have respect or manners any more. I’m disenchanted. It sucks. I like seeing the good in people and it’s getting increasingly more difficult.

I’ve come to the conclusion that working with the public is basically prostitution without the touching. Every time I smile and nod yes when a customer snaps their fingers or shakes their glass at me, part of my soul dies. Every time someone demeans or disrespects me because a) their food is taking too long b) they’ve had a few drinks or c) they’re just an asshole, I lose a piece of the strong woman I’ve worked so hard to become.

I had a table of seven last night. All early 20’s. 5 men, two women. All of them drinking, somewhat heavily. As a server, I pay close attention to this type of situation because I am liable if they are over served and people of that age group (in my experience) tend to drink more recklessly than others. The douchebag at the end of the table confirms my fears immediately by ordering a double Jack on the rocks, and a Coors Light. We don’t actually sell Coors Light on our menu, but our sister restaurant next door does, so I let him know I’ll have to grab one from next door, and I drop off his glass of whiskey. The beer follows a second later as I found one in the cooler. Ten minutes later, he orders another round. I give my manager the heads up that he’s on his second double and second beer. I can’t find a damn Coors light, and stop to check in with them to let him know I’m going to grab one from next door when he interrupts me, mouth full and eyes on his plate.

DB- My beer. Get that… and it’s been a while, so I’m not paying for it.

The entire table burst into laughter, and I walked away. I dropped their check and let my manager handle it from there on out. At a certain point? Enough is enough. I can only hold my tongue and allow people to be rude to me, for so long. Even when it’s busy and we’re making $35 an hour taking the abuse with a smile. I had a regular customer order a shot of tequila last week and when I delivered it with a lime, he acted like he was going to throw it at me and I flinched. He laughed. I’m still horrified that 1. He thinks its even ok to joke about throwing something at me, and 2. That I laughed it off after flinching instinctively.

As you do when someone throws something at you.

These are the moments that I shake my head at myself in disbelief. I don’t know what comes over people when they walk into a restaurant, but it isn’t pretty, and it’s only gotten uglier.

Would someone ever snap their fingers at workers at the DMV? Good luck with that. I doubt the response would be favorable and I guarantee it wouldn’t be in the ballpark of what mine is to a customer snapping at me for another beer.

Would you ever walk into the phone company and announce that it’s your birthday, in expectation that they give you a free days worth of service? People regularly complain to me that we don’t give them anything for their birthday, or anniversary. As if I’m intentionally withholding my highly influential server powers to change restaurant policy and deliver them the free chocolate cake they deserve for being born.

I work in the line of service. I knew what I was getting into when I went into this line of work. I’m happy to go above and beyond to help someone have a wonderful experience, but hate that my financial stability depends on me swallowing my pride and accepting what the worst customers can throw at me.

There seem to be more bad apples in the emptying barrel and during the slow season, the bad apples leave an even worse taste in your mouth because there are fewer positive experiences to offset them.

Maybe it’s time to go apply for a job at the DMV.

5 thoughts on “Disenchantment.

  1. Even as a customer, people who are too forceful or rude irritate me.

    Maybe you should move somewhere that has a better class of customers. Rural areas (which is where I think you live) tend more towards the boozy drinkers. So do some inner-cities. Perhaps some suburban nirvana exists somewhere where customers have manners and respect..

    Cheers, SD.

    • No, she lives in a nice touristy town so, although it’s not urban like DC, it’s not about the folks just being rough-mannered hicks.

      I think it’s gotten worse. I’m not in the service industry, but I notice it a lot when I’m out. I’m not really a foodie, but one of the reasons I like expensive places is because the diners are better behaved. It’s like going to church or something — you’re dressed up and paying a lot so you’re on your best manners. The family and casual date restaurants have sooo much bad behavior. I honestly don’t know the servers do it.

      Of course, I don’t have the expensive dining budget anymore, so that translates to just not going out much anymore! 😟

      Anyway, try to hang in there and remember that it’s not about you. It’s not personal. It’s them and they’d treat the Pope that way, if he put on an apron and served them a beer. 😄

  2. Where have the pages about a certain man gone? The one who subject to intense scrutiny.

    My blog links to this site no longer work, and a simple search doesn’t show them either.

    There must be a reason they’ve vanished?

    Cheers, SD.

    • J

      He sued me. I absolutely could have stood my ground, but he hired a particularly litigious nightmare and I value my peace. It was rough being on the receiving end of his phone calls again, and I went into a bit of hiding… but he rarely reads now. I do feel bad for his unsuspecting victims.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s