I’m in new territory. I’m not on my A game and I am flailing a little. It’s more than a little embarrassing. My i’s are not dotted. My t’s are not crossed.
I have been spelled into submission and I am flagrantly risking my hard-won freedom whilst I tie myself into aprons and slip into heels with the raw anticipation of seeing him for the first time in 8 years. I am woefully predictable when it comes to certain vices and he’s a walking list.
In a tie even, be still my heart.
He’s driving to work and voice texting me from his car. Apologizing for his grammar and punctuation. I’m so turned on that I feel flushed. This is the guy who created my penchant for smart men. Not just smart though… smarter than me. Eeeeek.
I text Miss Fancy the same screenshot.
J- I’m in danger. Humongous danger.
F- You’re in trouble.
He sends me his playlist and I love what he listens to. He wears a tie every day, y’all. Every DAY. He doesn’t love it, but I can work with that. I am nothing if not inspirational when inspired.
I’ve ghosted a few dozen men and deleted my Tinder account.
The poor pilot. He will not stop texting me. I’ve been sending him a few here and there because I can empathize with how much worse the silence is than disinterest, but I think maybe it might be easier if I just full Casper.
There is one factor…
He’s celibate. He took a year off and when my eyebrows bounced to my hairline, he laughed and quickly invited me to have sex with other people. Again. Instant shocked eyebrow face lift.
D- Is that a deal breaker? I understand if it is. I’ve been in an open relationship for years and don’t have any problem with you having sex, but I’m not right now.
Chaste dates with a man that embodies nearly every last vice and craving, I possess?
What am I getting myself into?