I forced myself out of bed at 5, dying a little. Feeling the whole weight of eating a cow and drinking a bowl of gin. My eyeballs ache. I have to force myself into the car and to my office. Struggling hard with a headache and a desperate need to nap. Not just tired.
Bothered, and not in a good way. I had to silence my phone to stop the whistling. Mr. Grey doesn’t wait for me to text him back and when I look at my phone there are 11 new messages from him. I feel inundated. I’m especially annoyed because Incredicock’s text tone cracks me up and I’ve missed it three times now because Grey can’t pump his brakes.
There’s a fine line to holding my interest. I’m not afraid to admit that. If I feel like I have to hide from him, I don’t want him anymore. I have a million things going on in a day and I don’t care what he ate for lunch. Not. At. All.
I actually have no desire to talk to him during his lunch break or on his drive home. I’m not a pacifier.
For the love of God. Why do all the wrong men chase me like a deer on the first day of hunting season?
I realize by going silent that I’m making the problem worse. If I want him to chill out, I have to out-text him, call during dinner and send him animated gifs all day. I know the path out, I just don’t care enough to follow it.
G- You must be busy today! Have a good one, gorgeous.
G- Flying Sunday?
G- I can fly over and pick you up so you don’t have to drive so far.
G- We could get lunch in Kalispell, Montana?
G- It was great to catch up with you.
G- Navy pinstriped tie today.
Sigh. I wish I cared, but he’s annoying the shit out of me. I feel like there’s a target on my back that I don’t know about. Yeeesh. I finally snapped.
J- Hey Chatty Kathy, I’m at work. I’ll text you when I get off.
G- Sorry babe, I woke up thinking about you. When do I get to see you again?
Where’s that annoyed emoji when I need it. I put my headphones back on and prayed he’d shut the fuck up. No luck. I finally Googled how to silence him, and a lovely little moon popped up beside his name. Finally, peace.
I raced to get my little Dumpling from school and took her to the park to play. It’s getting colder and darker earlier these days, so we’re trying to squeeze every last bit of playing outside. We walked home in the dusky twilight, holding hands.
This is why I don’t want a boyfriend. She’s my +1. I don’t want her to have to share my time with anyone. That may sound a little dramatic, but it’s really important to me. I only date when she’s asleep so she is none the wiser. She is really excited that my heels have come out of storage, though.
We walked up to the house and there was a long white box waiting by the front door.
It’s from Mr. Grey. I lifted the lid and it’s a big bunch of gorgeous pink roses.
D- Daddy sent me flowers!!!!
J- He’s such a nice daddy. Let’s put them in some water.
D- I want them to be in my room!
I thanked Grey for the roses and let him know it was a huge hit with the little one. I stopped short of telling him they were in her room.
G- Call me after she goes to bed.
J- I have to run. I’ll text you.
… … … ……………………..
and woke up to 14 messages, including some song lyrics and hearts.