The Best Date


It was shaping up to be one of the most uncomfortable Mondays in my life. I can’t honestly think of another one in history that rivals the idea of what yesterday looked like.

I had three cups of coffee… ie: 48 ounces of liquid jet fuel. I decided to run to work early and open up, then zip home to run a few miles on the elliptical machine.

I got everything set up for the day, and rushed home to find a little sanity with my running shoes. Four miles later, I don’t feel like I’m going to have a panic attack and I know it’s going to be a good day.

Just as I was hopping in the shower after my run, I got news that there was a 4-car accident right by my office. I had at least another hour of unexpected time at home.

In the morning.


I ran for the dryer and folded the still warm clothing that would have been cold and wrinkly by the end of the day. I even threw another load in! These are the exciting things I fill my free time with. I was filling the sink to wash the morning dishes when a text came whistling in from Mr. NotCalifornia, asking me what I was up to.

I told him about the accident, and he asked if I’d like to have lunch. I agreed before I could change my mind, and was on my way before I could panic. I’m an overthinker and I hate dates planned a week in advance. Ugh. No. That’s way too much time to obsess.

I got to the restaurant first and faced a whole new date dilema. I wanted a hard cider….but do I look like a derelict ordering a drink at noon? I thought about it before I ordered one. Laughing a little at myself because I’d rather die than tailor what I’m eating or drinking to please a man.. ….

He came in, grinning at me… which is contagious as always. He smiled at my cider and ordered a beer. My cheeks hurt from smiling after I hang out with him. It’s the most I’ve laughed in years, and it’s wholesome. Every time he tells me something new about himself, I have one thought. He’s a unicorn, like me.

He’s kind and attentive to the server. Something that earns epic bonus points in my book. I’ve been on dates with the opposite and it is my #1 dealbreaker.

He’s in his early 30’s, a retired tactical arms trainer with a farm in the country and a deep desire to learn how to grow fruit and vegetables. In other words, a successful hot guy with a gun collection and baby farm animals.

I told you the Karma Fairy loves me.

We laughed for 3 1/2 hours, or until I had to leave to get my little one from kindergarten… still holding the menus we never even bothered to look at.

N- May I walk you to your car?

J- Yes.

My family is full of military men, so I appreciate old school manners, and my new friend has an impeccable set. He walks on the outside of me and when I mentioned being safe walking with him, he said one of the hottest things I’ve heard in a long while.

N- I always have a gun on me. You’re absolutely safe.

I unlocked my door, he hugged me goodbye and thanked me for spending my day off with him.

I’m still grinning about it. I haven’t had so much fun in years and was laughing to myself about it while I made dinner when I got home, when a text from him came whistling in, saying the same and asking when I’m free again.

I was ruling out men entirely… but I kinda like this one.


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