Another Beautiful Day In Chaos

sometimes it works, sometimes it doesn't…

Torment

Not so Incredible, Cock.

It’s a horrible thing when you open screenshots that kick the chair out from underneath you. That happened to me today. I’m still reeling. I’ve thrown up a dozen times and I still can’t get the taste of him out of my mouth. I don’t know what it is about me, that even the nicest guys become glaring douchebags in my life. This year can honestly go fuck itself at […]

Continue Reading →

Derek the douchebag.

I knew when I agreed to this date that Derek was not my current type. I actually picked him for that reason. Let’s be honest… I’ve been ass deep in heartache and begging…. the least attractive a lady can be…. so I didn’t expect this to be a fun choice. This was a date based on vice, not vision. I have had a horrifying week full of sore muscles, financial […]

Continue Reading →

Moving Forward

I’ve wasted a year of my life pretending to be a sad little puddle. I’m all for optimism, but this is where being stubborn to a fault bites me in the ass. Regardless of the mixed signals he drowns me in, I should have loved myself enough to walk away from the pain of it all… a LONG time ago. The sight of him pains me and touching him is […]

Continue Reading →

Gone.

I lost my gay husband yesterday. I spent half the day on the phone with him, trying to talk him out of the jealousy that cripples him. I’ve had an unfaithful partner and know all too well how awful it feels to lay awake at night, wondering where they are. Wondering why you aren’t enough and why someone else is. Jealousy can ruin everything and insecurity is debilitating. When you […]

Continue Reading →

Sick.

It takes far too much to stop me. I’ve been getting more and more ill for the last two weeks. I added Crossfit to the mix so I’m also exercising to extremes for a half hour a few times a week. Personal turmoil is plentiful and I am hardly sleeping with a heavy heart. Being sick results in my saying far too many of my feelings out loud and my […]

Continue Reading →